His wife’s birthday was in three days (this is a man we’re talking about), so he was doing his “search and destroy” shopping for gift and card.
The clerk wasn’t busy, so he approached her hoping she’d have the perfect suggestion for his wife’s gift.
Although she’d only been straightening blouses on a rack, she ignored his first request for assistance.
He was a little louder with his second attempt to get some help from her, to which she replied that she was busy and she’d be with him as soon as she finished her “important” work.
Infuriated at being brushed off, he began telling her what he thought of her rude behavior, being especially clear, with very colorful language, telling what he thought of her value as a person.
Some people shouldn’t be allowed in public
There are those people who, for a variety of reasons, don’t have the skills to deal with others in a respectful manner. James encountered one of those people, but . . . .
For the rest of us, who often have to deal with the socially challenged, there is a need on our part to be prepared to cope with rudeness in a way that honors God and isn’t embarrassing to ourselves.
Here are some suggestions to help you cope with rude behavior:
- Respond from confidence — Don’t be a bully. Just act out of confidence.
Being confident means “faith or belief that one will act in a right, proper, or effective way.”
This results when you know who God has made you to be, and you act as a result of the assurance of that faith experience.
“Rudeness is the weak man’s imitation of strength” –Eric Hoffer
- Politeness overrules rudeness — When treated rudely, Paul expresses great wisdom in pointing out that, “If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head, and the Lord will reward you.” Proverbs 25:21-22
- Volume doesn’t dictate the “winner” — Raising your voice doesn’t make you the winner in opposition to rude behavior.
Because you’re louder, it only means you’ve attracted more attention to your bad behavior.
- Responding to rudeness with rudeness doesn’t mean you won, whatever that might mean to you — Winning isn’t about figuratively beating the rude person into submission.
“Winning” is a measure of whether you’ve honored God in your behavior, even if the rude person gets his way.
- Don’t allow yourself to be pulled down to the rude person’s level — Conduct yourself with Godly assurance and dignity.
Becoming the bully to out-rude the other person only means that you’ve lowered yourself to his level.
Is that where you want to be? (http://www.rd.com/advice/relationships/how-to-rise-above-rude-behavior/)
- After the encounter, you only hurt yourself if you ruminate over every detail again . . . and again . . . and again . . . rather than letting it go — Ask God for the strength to let go of the offensive behavior.
A person who gets stuck in past offenses remains the victim of the offender.
So, what about our friend James?
What do you think?
Did James handle it in the best way? If not, how do you think he might have behaved better?
I’d like to hear from you. Leave a comment.